In our personal and professional lives, there’s one powerful tool that consistently drives improvement, strengthens relationships, and promotes growth: feedback. Often viewed with a mix of anticipation and apprehension, feedback isn’t just a formality; it’s fundamental for progress. It’s how we learn what we’re doing well, where we can improve, and how our actions impact others.
But feedback isn’t a monologue; it’s a dynamic conversation, a two-way street that requires skill and empathy from both the giver and the receiver. When done right, it can transform individuals, teams, and even entire organisations. When done poorly, it can lead to resentment, misunderstandings, and stagnation.
Let’s explore why mastering this art is so crucial, as well as providing practical tips for both sides of the equation.
Why Does Feedback Matter?
Data from the Harvard Business Review found that, in response to being asked what was most helpful in their career, 72% of employees stated their performance would improve if they received corrective feedback from their manager. Meanwhile, Gallup’s data showed that 80% of employees who say they have received meaningful feedback in the past week are fully engaged in their work. Is it any wonder than that Workleap reported that 65% of employees want more feedback.
Here’s why it’s so vital:
- Self-Awareness: We all have blind spots. Getting input from people shines a light on how others perceive us and our work, bridging the gap between intention and impact.
- Skill Development: It pinpoints areas for improvement, helping us refine our strengths and address weaknesses. Whether it’s a presentation style, a coding technique, or a communication habit, constructive criticism provides the roadmap for skill building.
- Relationship Building: When delivered and received with respect, it builds trust and strengthens bonds. It shows you care enough to help someone grow, and it demonstrates your openness to learn from others.
- Performance Enhancement: For teams and organisations, regular feedback loops are essential for optimising processes, improving project outcomes, and achieving collective goals.
- Validation and Motivation: Positive comments, often overlooked, are incredibly powerful. They acknowledge hard work, celebrate successes, and motivate individuals to continue excelling.
How To Give Constructive Feedback
Giving feedback isn’t about criticising; it’s about helping someone grow. Here’s how to ensure your input is helpful, not hurtful:
- Be Specific and Factual: Vague statements like “You need to communicate better” aren’t helpful. Instead, say, “During yesterday’s meeting, when you presented the sales figures, I noticed you rushed through the Q&A section, which left some team members with unanswered questions.” Focus on observable behaviours, without making assumptions about intent.
- Focus on the Behaviour, Not the Person: Separate the action from the individual. Frame your feedback around what they have done, not who they are. “That report was sloppy” targets the person; “The formatting in section three of the report was inconsistent, which made it hard to read” targets the work.
- Use “I” Statements: This makes your feedback about your perception and experience, rather than being an absolute judgment. “I noticed X,” “I felt Y,” “I was concerned about Z.”
- Balance with Positives (But Don’t Sandwich): While the “feedback sandwich” (positive-negative-positive) can feel disingenuous, genuine positive reinforcement is crucial. Acknowledge what someone does well separately or weave it in authentically- such as when reviewing a project. “I really appreciated how you took the initiative on X. Regarding Y, I observed…” Check out AIHR’s post on Effective Feedback Methods for feedback frameworks that can help to structure your approach.
- Be Timely: Deliver feedback as close to the event as possible. The longer you wait, the less impactful and relevant it becomes.
- Choose the Right Setting: Sensitive feedback should almost always be given in private, not in front of others. Also, consider what you know about the person’s communication preferences. As University of Sussex state, “be mindful of how people want to receive information” since this will affect the degree to which they can engage with what you have to share.
- Offer Solutions or Suggestions: Don’t just point out a problem; help come up with ways to improve and offer support where appropriate/possible. “Have you considered trying X next time?” or “Perhaps we could work together on a strategy for Y.”
- Keep It Concise: Get to the point without overwhelming the receiver with too much information. Focus on one or two key areas for improvement.
- Ask for Understanding: After giving feedback, ask, “Does that make sense?” or “How do you feel about that?” to open a dialogue.
How To Receive Feedback Gracefully
Receiving feedback, especially critical feedback, can feel uncomfortable. Our natural instinct might be to jump to self-defensiveness. However, being able to embrace feedback is a sign of maturity and a commitment to self-improvement.
- Listen Actively – Don’t Interrupt: Your primary job is to understand. Let the person finish completely before you formulate a response. Try to listen for the full message, not just the words being said.
- Resist the Urge to Defend: It’s natural to want to explain your actions, but immediately doing so can come across as being defensive. Your explanation can come later, if needed, after you’ve fully processed what was said.
- Ask Clarifying Questions: If something is unclear or too vague, ask for more details. “Can you give me a specific example of what you mean?” or “When did this happen?”
- Thank the Giver: It takes courage to give feedback. A simple “Thank you for taking the time to share this with me” shows you value their input, even if it’s tough to hear.
- Reflect and Process: Don’t feel pressured to respond immediately. Take time to think about the feedback. Is it accurate? Is there a kernel of truth? How can you apply it?
- Don’t Take It Personally: Remember, the feedback is usually about a specific action or behaviour, not about your worth as a person.
- Follow Up (If Appropriate): If you’ve discussed an action plan, follow up to show how you’ve taken the feedback and made changes. This demonstrates your commitment to growth and builds trust.
- Don’t Seek Reassurance or Approval: Avoid asking questions like, “So, am I really bad at this?” or trying to get the giver to soften their message. Stick to understanding the input.
Conclusion
When both givers and receivers commit to these principles, feedback transforms from a daunting task into a constructive tool for progress. It contributes towards a culture of continuous learning, mutual respect, and accelerated development.
So, the next time you’re faced with giving or receiving feedback, intentionally approach it as an opportunity. An opportunity to grow, to help others grow, and to build stronger, more effective relationships and outcomes. Embrace it, master it, and watch the positive ripple effect it creates.
To learn more about how you can develop your core skills, check out our Career Pathways page.