We are beyond excited to share Alix’s experiences around mentoring in education through her role as a school-based mentor; learning all about the wins, the challenges, and the lessons she has learned along the way. She shares her unique insights into the realities of providing support for the children that she works with, along with her passion for making a positive difference in their lives.
Read on to find out more…
How long have you been a mentor?
I am now in my second school year, so the end of July will officially be the two years anniversary of me being a mentor.
What type of mentoring do you practice?
I work with primary school children, and my role is sort of like an umbrella- it covers lots of different things. I do a lot of inclusion work and behaviour management. I provide support on the playground, in class, or even at home. Well-being is a big part of it- anything around emotions, self-esteem, friendship issues and so on.
I also do a lot of liaising with other professionals including teachers, local authorities, and other support workers.
What (if any) type of training have you completed/intend to undertake?
I did the Mentoring Children and Young People Qualification with The Mentoring School. I started in April 2024, and then completed it in September 2024, before graduating that December. I learned so much, and loved that I could do it whilst working.
I am currently doing a government funded Level 3 in Mental Health Awareness. I find it can be a lot to do a full day and then to do it outside of working hours, but I am really enjoying it and definitely want to pursue it. It is fascinating!
Honestly, I would like to do a lot more CPD training. I did in my first year of mentoring, but then it was specifically targeted towards the situation at hand. For example, if I were supporting an autistic pupil I would do training directly around that. If anything, I find that courses can make a lot more sense when you have a particular child or situation in mind as you go through the learning. It adds a new level of context.
I don’t think I have done any so far this year, so I am going to try and see if I can do more. I love a good CPD short course- an afternoon or a couple of days can be really good.
What made you interested in becoming a mentor?
When I first started in my current school it was as a teaching assistant, half in reception and half in year six (which is quite a big gap). About six months in I realised that I was naturally very interested in the children’s well-being. Whenever something happened and they came to speak to me I would then communicate with a teacher and the other learning mentor. I think I was instinctively seeing the whole picture when a child displayed a problem or something.
Then when one of the learning mentors was leaving, my management team came to find me and suggested that I try the position. I was surprised at first, as I didn’t even really know at the time what a learning mentor even was. The more I looked into it, the more it appealed to me. I fit the requirements so decided to take the role on. It was a bit of a once in a lifetime opportunity situation, so I went for it. Looking back, I think it was my calling. It feels that it just makes sense.
What is your favourite part about being a mentor?
One of the things I love is working with other professionals. When I first started being a mentor I was panicking about having to be a problem solver and fixing things. I worried that it was going to be isolating and prove too much for one person. But I’ve quickly realised that I am part of a team. I work with lots of other professionals, including those outside of the school. There are specialist teachers, educational psychologists, speech and language therapists, CAMHS, clinicians, mental health practitioners… all of these people working together under the well-being umbrella.
Being part of that team, getting to meet with them, do interventions alongside them, taking part in feedback meetings- I just find it all so fascinating. It’s especially so when you work with more than one other professional about a specific child. It makes you realise how great it is- the amount of support that can be put in place for just one child.
There are professionals that I find inspiring; I like gathering knowledge from them and with them. I think that’s why I love my job so much- because I get to be in the middle of it all as a facilitator.
For example, if tomorrow I say I have concerns about a child, the teacher and I would get together with our SENCO and say ‘we’re concerned about this, this, and this’. Depending on the budget and timing, the SENCO might be able to say, ‘I can involve the speech and language therapist, or you can contact CAMHS, or you can do this, you can do that…’ Then we all come together to find strategies. I think if there was just one person involved, either inside or outside of school, they would only be able to take action on a small part of the problem.
In truth, I find it really moving how different professions can all come together and bring solutions for the problems that a child is displaying at the time. Some of them have got such an unfortunate start in life, and we get together to change that a little bit. I get to facilitate that, be part of that, and see it all happening around the child.
What is a challenge you have faced whilst mentoring?
I would say the main one is the fact that, regardless of how much support you can put in place for a child, if they come from an underprivileged background then they have fewer opportunities and chances in life. I do my job because I care about these children, so seeing obstacles put in their way which might never be lifted is hard.
I find it difficult that some of our most vulnerable children, that we work super hard with, at the end of the day are still dependent on their families who may be facing mental health, background, financial issues etc. It’s all part of the system, and the system is failing them. School is a safe place for them, but as soon as they are out of school… It’s a lot bigger than us. I find it really frustrating- that feeling like we are up against a system which is not supporting people and can sometimes even get in the way of the efforts and progress we make.
It can be very hard when you feel you have done a lot of work with a child but then the child goes home and they’re being relocated, or there’s domestic violence involved, or another barrier. I know that I’ve done my best, but I wish I could help more.
I would say that the other thing I sometimes find challenging is the parents. I can be trying to explain to them that we have their child’s best interests at heart, but they just won’t trust us. It’s often because of their own experiences, but sometimes I just know that they are going to undo all of the work that we have been doing with the child.
For example, we have a family, and we’ve offered a free club for a child. The child loves the club, and they have developed such great social skills from being part of it. Then recently the parent has said that they are too tired to pick up their child after the club. So now they are just picked up straight after school, and don’t do any extra-curricular activities, or even go to the park. The just sit at home on their tablet. That is very frustrating because I have known the parent for a while, I have a good relationship with them, and have suggested other solutions, but they just say no.
I have to stay professional, so I have to bite my tongue and just go, ‘alright, well whenever you are ready the offer is there’.
What piece of advice would you give to people thinking about being a mentor?
Be humble. You are not there to fix children; you are there to just help them on their journey.
Don’t take all the credit- remember that you are part of a team.
Also, don’t be too hard on yourself. There will be limits to what you can do, so just play to your strengths. You will have days that are more challenging than others, so take them a bit slower. If you can’t give yourself some self-compassion, you won’t be able to give it to the children.
Children need to be heard, and as the person not in the heat of the classroom you can make sure that they are. You can be that person who just takes a moment to go and listen and then try to find solutions to their problems.
And keep learning. It is one thing to have your heart in the right place, but the more you learn, the more you will be able to spot patterns and connect the dots earlier. Figure out what feels natural and what needs more development.
What are your plans for mentoring in the future?
I am thinking of maybe specialising in neurodiversity, as I would say that a lot of the children I have in my caseload have either underlying or diagnosed neurodiversity. I think we are lucky, at least in London, as it seems that there is quite a lot of open mindedness around neurodiversity and how to provide support both inside and outside of class. That is something I would like to look into a bit more.
If you would like to be a part of this project, don’t hesitate to get in touch via hello@thementoringschool.com
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